- Top Tips For Parents
Issue #5 November 9, 2005
Always Another Chance! is published by Frank McGinty for opt-in subscribers only.
In This Edition
1. Editorial 2. Feature Article: Parenting Skills - Five Ways To Turbo-Boost Your Confidence 3. Laugh It Off! 4. Think About It! 5. General & Unsubscribe Info
1. Editorial
Greetings,
Grace and I have returned from a fantastic trip to Texas, and life is very much back to normal now.
If you'd like to share the highlights of our trip and some of my comments on what we saw and did, then check out my blog, http://www.frank-mcginty.com/weblog and click on the link 'Notes From Texas' which you'll see in the right sidebar.
The trip was characterised by hospitality, courtesy, efficiency, and a bright, sunny outlook on life. Certainly not as I'd imagined life in Texas, so it came as a pleasant and welcome surprise.
Our proposed trip down to New Orleans - mentioned in a previous issue - was, understandably, not to be. I did get the chance, however, to speak to some of the victims of Hurricane Katrina and I was impressed by their courage, resilience and sense of humour.
Many of them are being housed in local hotels, but others are doing the best they can in sports stadia and other public buildings.
One rather alarming note: these evacuees are receiving funds from the Government for up to a year to tide them over until they can find jobs, houses, schools, and so on.
Yet some of the people I saw were clearly in a state of shock or trauma and it's possible they won't have the strength to get their lives together in such a relatively short space of time.
Let's hope and pray they receive all the help and assistance they need, no matter how long it takes. And if our experience of Texas hospitality is anthing to go by, then they won't need to worry.
A Word About Spelling!
I mentioned last time that we had readers from all over the world, so I hoped they wouldn't find my brand of 'Scottish' English too different.
Well, one good lady got in touch and said she HAD been rather surprised by the amount of 'typos', but wondered if they had something to do with my locality.
When I asked her for clarification, it turned out she hadn't realised that here in the UK we spell some words differently. (Check out 'humour' above, for example. Would you spell it 'humor'?)
I know, the American way is much more logical - 'center' is better than 'centre', surely! - but here we still keep our ties to European languages, so there will be the occasional difference.
And A Word Of Thanks!
In a matter of a few months my website, www.frank-mcginty.com, has roared up the Alexa ratings. (Alexa is the organisation that measures website traffic and lists them in order. The mighty 'Yahoo!' is currently at number 1, and Google is at number 18.)
My site has gone from 'No Data' at the beginning, which means it was down among the many millions that are too numerous to list, to its current position of 158,940.
Not quite up there with the big ones yet, but an amazing jump in a short space of time! :-)
Many thanks to all those who have made that happen. If you want to see what all the fuss is about, then pay a visit to http://www.frank-mcginty.com
This improvement simply shows the interest people have in parenting. You'll find solid advice to help you in what I always say is the single, most important task in our lives - raising our children. (But I mustn't forget the young readers who check out the books on my website. - Thanks to them, too!!)
And, As Promised . . .
In case you missed any previous issues, or just want to re-visit some, they are now online: http://www.frank-mcginty.com/ezine.html
You can use the articles for any publication (e.g. an online project, or a church newsletter), so long as you print them in their entirety and include the writer's details and web link at the bottom.
My very best wishes!
Frank http://www.frank-mcginty.com/for-parents.html
2. Feature Article
Parenting Skills - Five Ways To Turbo-Boost Your Confidence
(c) Frank McGinty All Rights Reserved
The 'phone conversation had nothing at all to do with parenting - but it made me think . . .
"Hello, Eastbank Football Club. Can I help you?"
"Good morning, may I speak with the Assistant Coach, please?"
"Oh, I'm sorry. He's still on vacation."
"I see. Is anyone on the coaching staff there?"
"No, they're all away right now. The club's closed for another week. I'm only the Groundsman."
"Well, thanks anyway. And hey, why say you're only the Groundsman? If it wasn't for you, there wouldn't be a football club. They'd have nowhere to play!"
(Pause) "Yeah, I'd never really thought of it like that. (Laughter) Thanks a lot, pal, you've made my day!"
So often we do ourselves down, don't we? We devalue our own contribution or service.
"I'm only a shop assistant!"
"I'm only a . . . " (fill in the blank!) Sometimes we even hear women say: "I'm just a housewife"!
Confidence and self-esteem are often in short supply these days. And nowhere more so than in PARENTING!
Even those who are superbly confident in their work or social situations, often teeter on the edge when it comes to their parenting skills.
Why?
Is it something to do with the breakdown in old-fashioned values and concepts of authority; the widening gulf between kids and their parents; the dangers we as parents are so acutely aware of, but which are casually dismissed by our kids?
Whatever the causes, there's a lot you can do to improve things.
STEP 1 Dr Norman Vincent Peale, author of 'The Power Of Positive Thinking', used to advise people to sit down and write out a list of all their assets and abilities.
But Dr Peale's next suggestion is crucial. Once the list of assets and abilities has been written, he tells us to raise the stakes. Simply BELIEVE that you are AT THE VERY LEAST 10% better than you think. It's now widely acknowledged in modern psychology that you'll still be way off the mark! So have faith. You're better than you think.
STEP 2 Do some study. You probably weren't taught parenting skills at school or college, yet parenting is the most vital contribution to society. There are lots of books, courses, tapes, CDs and videos on parenting. No excuses! Grab some and get busy. Knowledge and insight bring confidence. Whatever stage you're at, you can improve yourself.
STEP 3 Learn to temper your reaction in stressful parenting situations. Easier said than done! But you can make a conscious effort to stay calm and remind yourself of Dr Peale's advice (You're more capable than you think you are!), and you can put into practice what you've been studying about family dynamics.
STEP 4 Develop yourself in some way. Yes, remember those piano lessons you once took, or that art class you attended? Interests like these are great stress relievers and they build self-confidence - which is vital for parenting. If you feel you're already confident in other matters, but it's only in parenting you feel a lack, why not take up some activity with your kids? Learning together brings you together, and can be great fun!
STEP 5 Finally, resist any temptation to go it alone. Nature intended us to be social creatures. Seek advice from grandparents, relatives, friends. Overcome your pride. Discuss your parenting challenges with others and draw on the communal strength. And d'you know what? You'll find you're not alone. Let's work on parenting together, as a community.
Confident parents raise confident kids.
So take action now. If you do nothing, you can look forward to more of the same worry, tension, ill-feeling, and so on.
Let's zap these negative trends once and for all.
Happy parenting!
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3. Laugh It Off!
The 'Mothers' Advice' snippets seem to have gone down well in the last issue - so here are a few more for you to enjoy!
ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S MOTHER: "The stovepipe hat again, Abe? Can't you just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"
MARY'S MOTHER: "I'm not upset that your lamb followed you to school, Mary, but I would like to know how he got a better grade than you."
BATMAN'S MOTHER: "It's a nice car, Bruce, but do you realize how much the insurance is going to be?"
LITTLE MISS MUFFET'S MOTHER: "Well, all I've got to say is if you don't get off your tuffet and start cleaning your room, there'll be a lot more spiders around here!"
JONAH'S MOTHER: "That's a nice story, but now tell me where you've really been for the last three days."
SUPERMAN'S MOTHER: "Clark, your father and I have discussed it, and we've decided you can have your own telephone line. Now will you quit spending so much time in all those phone booths?"
THOMAS EDISON'S MOTHER: "Of course I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb, Thomas. Now turn off that light and get to bed!
4. Think About It!
Smile at each other; smile at your wife, smile at your husband, smile at your children, smile at everyone, it doesn't matter who it is. And that will help you to grow up in greater love for each other.
--- Mother Teresa Of Calcutta
5. General & Unsubscribe Info
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